50 Bear Riddles With Answers
Bear riddles, most of them cheerfully terrible puns. "Bear" and "bare" sound identical, which is a gift to riddle writers and a burden to everyone else.
Nearly all of these suit children. Every one has its answer here.
A great banquet was prepared for a Roman emperor and his courtiers. 22 Dormice, 40 Larks' Tongues, 30 Flamingos, and 40 Roast Parrots were served. How many portions of Boiled Ostrich were served?
Each dish's serving count is generated by assigning point values to the vowels and consonants of its name, and applying the same rule to 'Boiled Ostrich' gives 42.
A large truck is crossing a bridge 1 mile long. The bridge can only hold 14000 lbs, which is the exact weight of the truck. The truck makes it halfway across the bridge and stops. A bird lands on the truck. Does the bridge collapse?
Fuel burned during the drive reduces the truck's total weight, leaving enough margin under the limit for the added weight of the bird.
A bird has a head 9cm long. The tail is equal to the size of the head plus half of the size of the body. The body is the size of the head plus the tail. How long is the bird?
Solving the system of equations for head, tail, and body in terms of each other gives head=9, tail=27, body=36, totaling 72cm.
What are the freedom of birds and the pen of old men?
Feathers give birds the freedom of flight and, as quills, were historically used as pens for writing.
NASA was considering sending canaries into space to study them under zero gravity. The project was scrapped when someone realized that in spite of having sufficient water supplies, they could die of dehydration within a few hours. Why?
Birds' swallowing mechanism relies on gravity to move water down the throat, unlike humans, so without gravity they couldn't drink despite having water.
There are 10 birds on a branch, a man shot 5 of them. How many were left?
As with the similar fence riddle, the gunshot would scare away all the surviving birds, leaving none on the branch.
What kind of can never needs a can-opener?
'Pelican' contains the word 'can' but is a bird, not a container, so it never needs opening.
What did the parrot say on the 4th of July?
The joke swaps the classic phrase 'Polly wants a cracker' for a firecracker, fitting the Independence Day theme.
Can one bird change a light bulb?
'Toucan' puns on 'two can', joking that a single bird (one) can't but a toucan (two can) could.
Twenty-seven ducks are going to the pond. Five of them got lost, thirteen of them are staying home, and nine of them are at the pond. Where are the rest of them?
5 + 13 + 9 equals exactly 27, so there are no ducks left unaccounted for despite the riddle implying there should be.
Why are the rates at the bird hotel so much higher than other 4-star hotels?
'Toucan' puns on 'two can', meaning two birds can stay for the price of one, but priced as if it's one high rate.
Birds of a feather flock together. What is the contradictory proverb?
'Opposites attract' directly contradicts the idea that similar things group together, as in 'birds of a feather'.
Why did the eagle not fly over the sea?
'Sea' plus 'gull' sounds like 'seagull', punning on the eagle becoming a different bird by name alone.
What do you get when you cross a parrot with a centipede?
'Walkie-talkie' puns on the parrot's ability to talk and the centipede's many legs for walking.
What do you call two birds that are in love?
'Tweet-hearts' puns on 'sweethearts', replacing 'sweet' with a bird's 'tweet'.
A feathered Biped in the terminal part of the arm equals in value a pair of feathered bipeds in densely branched shrubbery. What is the proverb?
The riddle restates the classic proverb 'a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush' using overly technical synonyms.
They can trickle down, They can tickle too. Or make you sneeze, Or comfort you. Their rustling sound, you've rarely heard, Unless you're a pillow or a bird! What are they?
The clues about tickling, causing sneezes, rustling, and being inside pillows and on birds all point to feathers.
Why do birds fly south?
The joke gives a literal, absurd reason for migration instead of the real biological one.
I make the leaves green, I make the dirt brown, I make the bluebirds blue, I make all of your dreams come true. What am I?
The riddle lists colors it 'makes', pointing to crayons that can color anything any shade, including making dreams (drawings) come true.
I can't see yet I know you're there. I'm not a cow but I'm leather. I'm a rare find but follow paths. I can fly but I'm not a bird. What am I?
The clues describe echolocation (blind but knows you're there), leathery wings, and flight without being a bird — a bat.
What kind of bird writes?
'Pen-guin' hides the word 'pen', a writing instrument, inside 'penguin'.
What bird is very rude?
'Mocking' bird puns on the word 'mocking', meaning to make fun of someone rudely.
1. Where do fish go on vacation? 2. Where do songbirds go on vacation? 3. Where do zombies go on vacation? 4. Where do Thanksgiving Birds go on vacation? 5. Where do geometry teachers go on vacation? 6. Where do locksmiths go on vacation?
Each destination is a pun on the traveler: fish go to Finland (fins), songbirds to the Canary Islands (canaries), zombies to the Dead Sea, Thanksgiving birds to Turkey, geometry teachers to Cuba (cube), and locksmiths to the Florida Keys (keys).
What do you call a tavern of blackbirds?
'Crowbar' puns on a group of crows and the tool name, reimagined as a bar for crows.
White bird, featherless, flyin' out o' paradise, flyin' over sea and land, dyin' in my hand. What is it?
The riddle describes something white, without feathers, that falls from the sky and melts (dies) in your hand — a snowflake.
Inside napper, bird chaser, quick stoker, small animal killer, fish eater. What is it?
Each clue describes a common cat behavior: napping indoors, chasing birds, moving quickly, hunting small animals, and eating fish.
What do you call a sticky crow?
'Vel-Crow' is a pun blending 'Velcro' with 'crow'.
There are ten birds sitting on a fence. You shoot one. How many are left?
The riddle's twist is that a gunshot would scare off the surviving birds, leaving none behind despite the arithmetic seeming to say nine.
What bird can be heard at mealtimes?
'Swallow' is both a bird and the act of swallowing food, which happens at mealtimes.
If there is a Yellow house on Bluebird Lane, a Green house on Orange Street, a Pink house on Kitten Road, a Black house on Whitehorse Pike and a Purple house on Firebird hill, where is the White house?
The riddle is a misdirection about house colors on fictional streets, but 'the White House' actually refers to the real building in Washington, D.C.
Forward and forward I go, never looking back. My limit no one knows, more of me do they lack. Like a river, I do flow, and as an eagle, I fly. Now can you guess, what am I?
The poem describes something that only moves forward, is limitless, flows, and flies swiftly — the abstract concept of time.
If there are fifteen crows on a fence and the farmer shoots a third of them, how many crows are left?
The math trick is a distraction; the real answer relies on the fact that a gunshot would scare all the remaining crows away.
What was never scared but became petrified, can't make a bird but can make a bat, can't live in a house but would die to have one. What is it?
Wordplay: 'petrified' also means turned to stone/wood, wood makes a baseball bat not a bird, and a tree provides the wood for a house but isn't itself housed.
If it takes 5 microwaves and 5 minutes to cook 5 chickens, how long does it take 100 microwaves to cook 100 chickens?
Since each microwave cooks one chicken independently in 5 minutes, adding more microwaves doesn't change the per-batch cook time.
What bird is always out of breath?
'Puffin' sounds like 'puffing', as someone out of breath would do.
Why did the scarecrow win so many awards?
'Outstanding in his field' puns on excelling at something and literally standing out in a farm field.
I'm the part of the bird that's not in the sky. I can swim in the ocean and yet remain dry. What am I?
A shadow follows the bird along the ground or water's surface without ever getting wet or leaving the ground.
Why kind of entertainment does Yosemite National Park have?
Wordplay — "Bear-itones" sounds like "baritones," a type of singer, fitting for a park known for its bears.
What do kids, worms, bears, fish, and rings all have in common?
Each of these has a popular gummy-candy version: gummy bears, gummy worms, gummy fish, gummy rings, and gummy vitamins.
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. What is the contradictory proverb?
While one proverb says to accept gifts graciously, the other warns that gifts can hide danger or deception, from the story of the Trojan Horse.
What do you call a bear which is fast asleep?
"Bearly awake" is a pun on "barely awake," replacing "barely" with "bear" for the animal.
What did the koala say to the bear on the phone?
Wordplay — "koala" sounds like "call ya," as in "I'll call you later."
What do you call a polar bear at the beach?
Wordplay — "Sandy Claws" sounds like "Santa Claus," combined with a bear's claws covered in sand.
What did the zombie bring to bed?
'Deaddy bear' puns on 'teddy bear,' fitting the zombie's undead ('dead') nature.
What do you call a little bear who never takes a bath?
Wordplay — "Phew," the sound made when smelling something bad, replaces "Pooh" in Winnie the Pooh's name.
How do you spell the word 'Panda' in two letters?
The word "panda" hides the word "and" inside it, so spelling out just "P" and "A" leaves "(and)a" implied.
What type of Martial Arts does Winnie the Pooh do?
Wordplay — "Kung Pooh" plays on "Kung Fu," combined with the character's name Winnie the Pooh.
What did the panda ghost say?
Wordplay — "bamboo," a panda's favorite food, is stretched out to sound like the ghostly "boo."
When are boys like bears?
Wordplay — "bare-footed," without shoes, sounds like "bear-footed."
What do you call a bear with no ear?
Removing the letters "ear" from "bear" leaves just the letter "b."
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Every category comes with the answers on the page.